It's Complicated
Parenting is Complicated
People are complicated. Which is why, more often than not, our greatest stress in life comes from relationships with spouses, kids, family, and co-workers. In this series, we’ll look into God’s wisdom for how to relate with others in a way that brings peace, joy, and fulfillment.
Links
Series
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Speakers
Marcus Avalos
Lead Pastor
Parenting Question: “ARE WE DOING THIS RIGHT?” DIRECTION DETERMINES DESTINATION
My North Star: RELATIONSHIPS RULE
Mark 12:29-31 ‘Hear, O Israel, the LORD our God, the LORD is one. 30 And you shall love the LORD your God (daddy, parent) with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength.’ This is the first commandment. 31 And the second, like it, is this: You shall love your neighbor (brother, sister, others) as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these.”
ANDY STANLEY - “If you’re a Christian and your faith is getting in the way of your relationship with your children, you may have subscribed to the wrong version of your faith.”
FOUR STAGES OF PARENTING The Discipline Years (0–5 years old) The Training Years (5–12 years old) The Coaching Years (12–18 years old) The Friendship Years (18+ years old)
DISCIPLINE YEARS (0-5 yrs old) Teach them that there are consequences. Role: Strengthen your child’s obedience muscle through multiple reps and appropriate consequences.
TRAINING YEARS (5-12 yrs old) You TRAIN while you EXPLAIN. Role: Help them Understand the WHY behind the rules and expectations. The SKILLS you want them to have in PUBLIC, you must train in PRIVATE
COACHING YEARS (12-18 yrs. Old) You CONNECT more than you CORRECT. Role: Loosen the right reins of training years and move to the sidelines for coaching. Goal: Keep them coming to you for guidance and support
FRIENDSHIP YEARS (18+) Reap the Rewards of all that sweat equity...hopefully! Engage as adults who enjoy each other’s company. You’re always the parent but allow them to initiate your input in your conversations.
APPLICATION:
- CHILD HURT BY A FAILING PARENT – The PATH towards FORGIVENESS is NECESSARY (listen to Message 2 by Pastor Joel)
- FEELING SHAMED AS A PARENT – Forgive Yourself. Your Worth It. Start fresh today: throw away the old parenting toolbox and start collecting new tools. Read. Pray. Love.
- YOUNG FAMILIES: DIRECTION DETERMINES DESTINATION. Sit down this week and Establish your PARENTING DIRECTION. Your children are worth it.